How to Recognise the Moments That Matter Most
Are you enjoying deeper connections and meaningful relationships with the people you care about?
Do you know what it takes to be a truly great listener?
There are moments in life when someone you love needs more than casual conversation. They may be feeling vulnerable, anxious, or upset—but instead of expressing their feelings directly, they’ll often approach the conversation in a roundabout way.
This is your moment to truly listen.
It’s not about solving problems, giving advice, or telling stories. It’s about understanding. Because when people feel vulnerable, what they’re really craving is connection.
Welcome to the Listening blog—a space for life hacks, relationship tips, personal empowerment, and, most of all, deep connection. This post is part of a series inspired by the book Listening – A Guide to Building Deeper Connections. We share ideas to help you grow stronger in life and relationships. All are welcome—so feel free to share this with a friend who could use a deeper connection.
Tip #2 – Know When to Really Listen
“We use the word ‘listening’ as though it’s a constant that never changes… but your reason for listening, or the way you listen, will change depending on the situation or context.”
— Listening – A Guide to Building Deeper Connections
You might be an excellent listener at work—but those same habits don’t always translate well at home. When someone you love is feeling vulnerable, they don’t need advice, feedback, or direction. They need you to listen differently.
So how do you know when it’s time to tune in at that deeper level?
Here are three signs it’s time to truly listen:
1. You notice unusual behaviour
People give us clues when something’s wrong—and one of the biggest is acting out of character. If someone you love starts behaving in ways that seem “off,” it may be their way of signalling a deeper issue. Don’t dismiss it. That’s your cue to pause and listen.
2. You see emotional signals
When someone is visibly upset, don’t rush in with solutions or try to lighten the mood with a story. Instead, stop talking and start listening. Just be with them in the emotion. You’ll be amazed at what you hear when you do.
3. The topic is important to them
This may sound obvious, but it’s surprisingly easy to overlook. If you know the conversation matters deeply to the other person—make it matter to you too. Let go of your agenda and listen with your full presence.
We can’t listen deeply all the time—it’s exhausting and often unnecessary. But when the people we care about need us, those are the moments to lean in, recognise the signs, and give them our full attention.
Want to explore this further?
📖 Grab a copy of Listening – A Guide to Building Deeper Connections – available in paperback, eBook, or audiobook.
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Because listening well isn’t just a skill—it’s a gift.